Done is better then perfect

I’ve got a new mantra. Done is better then perfect. You know how reflective I get from time to time. And considering my current mindset of ‘not happy with the person I am in general/not doing enough’ it became even harder to really try to register what I wanted to say. I was trying to pinpoint what my ‘issue d’jour’ is and I’m disappointed that I’m even mentioning a ‘daily’ issue. Life should not be full of issues. I should not be inconveniencing myself with things that have no relevant need in my life. Letting go is a necessity and something I admit I’m not very good at.

But this post is about letting go in a different way. I need to stop becoming so emotionally wrapped up in perfection and seemingly stupid expectations I set upon myself. Yes, I am my own worst enemy. I need to just get things done. Expending so much time and focus on such futile and irrelevant things is ridiculous. I spent the entire day yesterday looking at where to have an early dinner after Nilsa’s baptism in NYC and you know what I came up with? NOTHING. I only accomplished to waste a day with no resolution. What a complete waste of time. And why did I do it? I was attempting to find a place that would satisfy all these ‘must haves’ that I listed (parking, good food, celebratory but not fancy, budget, etc.) when all that matters is having a place to sit and eat with family and friends.

Sometimes done is better than perfect because the perfection is a subjective opinion that I’ve self imposed. My definition of perfection, I feel, over exceeds most people’s standard expectations. I work at trying to present an amazing experience in most everything I value doing and the perfectionism ends up causing procrastination and lack of progress. Progress of even the smallest kind is an accomplishment. I need to accept that and accept that most of the time, “good enough” will do.

Especially now when my list is overwhelming and long and I bitch and gripe about how long it is and how my time is so limited. But why aren’t things getting done? Because I have high expectations of how they should be done when really, they just need to be done so I can move on to more important things. I’m being bogged down by details and decisions that are really far more simple then I make them out to be. The insane (asinine??) thing is just being done with something will eventually leave me with 'I could have done it better syndrome.' I need to let go of that too. I know that the harder I am on myself, the more talented I am as a result. Never-the-less, being down on myself only creates a toxic environment that helps no one in the long run and doesn’t let me achieve much of anything. I'm living a paradoxical life.

If you always try to do more than you planned to do instead of stopping to congratulate yourself for getting something done, you probably work too hard to be effective.

So new mantra…. done is better than perfect. And I’ll let myself think of perfect in the future when and if I have managed to accomplish the majority of things. After all I am lucky have 3 things that are perfect in my life…




What more do i need?

Bad Mama but total cuteness

So yeah - I've been slacking in the posting. Busy. So here's a quick post. Remember my post back in August of 2006 about Ari's vintage baby walker and this adorable little man in said walker

Well it's back with Nilsa who is an absolute MASTER at it.

She follows Ari around the entire house with it

and because I have favorite pictures from time to time - this is my latest favorite

I'll try to be more diligent in posting her. Summer brings on the kind of activity that generally keeps you wanting to get outside rather then on the computer.

On kids sharing a room

So I finally bit the bullet and put Ari and Nilsa in the same room. The house is such right now that sharing a room is a necessity and I’ve no qualms with it. The M.O. is to put Ari down first – read his book, say a prayer (in Spanish!) play the music and let him be. He will fall asleep on his own shortly after and 9 times out of 10 on the recliner. Fine. When all seems quiet-ish I go in with Nilsa who usually falls asleep on the bed in our room. Sometimes Ari is awake when I go in and he has quietly whispered ‘Goodnight Nilsa’ in the past (so cute.)

Yesterday, though, the moon was full and I made the mistake of not turning off the TV or closing my bedroom door when I carried in Nilsa. There was Ari, awake on the recliner with all his stuffed animals (have I mentioned this? He sleeps with the tickle me Elmo his godparents gave him, the stuffed Shamu he got at Sea World, a large stuffed Coqui (Puerto Rican tree frog), a small natural haired teddy bear Carol got him from Ecuador, a plush teddy bear, and a bunny rabbit he got from his ‘Uncle’ Roman for his first Easter.) Back to the story – he totally took advantage of my carrying a sleeping Nilsa and quickly ran past me saying T.V. into my bedroom.

Great.

I got him back into his room. It was not a pretty site. He was flailing about annoyed at the fact that he’d have to go to sleep. He then started the shrieking attempt at fake crying. I said a prayer that Nilsa was used to sleeping through his noise making and left the room and went downstairs. Through the monitor I heard the whining cries and then a minute later the tell tale signs of a waking Nilsa. Her obviously annoyed ‘who woke me up” cry. And the minute it occurred I hear Ari go from a wailing child to a quiet one, and not a second later I heard him say…..

“Uh Oh”

When I went up to pacify Nilsa back to sleep, I opened the door to find Ari on the recliner. Head on his pillow and blanket over him. Eyes closed too tightly to truly be asleep. The boy was faking sleeping. Well now he’ll know better then to play that game.

I love him.

Picture Dump