Random Ramblings...

I was in Brooklyn last night. I had a meeting at Café Vox Pop which I will totally recommend for great coffee, delicious whole wheat chocolate chip cookies and great music. I entered to jazz playing, an adorable and attentive barista (is there a male version of that word?) and just a mellow vibe that was ideal. I almost lamented having to perform a meeting as I would have loved to just sip on my coffee and listen to the music and relax. So for the 5 minutes that I did have to myself in the café I soaked in the atmosphere. The drive out to Brooklyn was uneventful. Because the meeting was late (8pm) and I left New Jersey early, I didn’t hit a barrage of traffic en route. Some congestion in China Town which is to be expected and I opted the more scenic side streets of Brooklyn rather then the Gowanas/BQE/Prospect Parkway. I find that I’m in Brooklyn often lately, meeting with potential clients, handling weddings, etc. For a Queens girl I have grown to truly love Brooklyn as it seems has everyone else as it’s like “THE” place to be right now.

Beyond that it was time to myself. Something that does not come as often as I wish but such is life and I’m not complaining about it. The lack of that time makes me truly appreciate the moments I have in silence, alone, and in my own thoughts. It’s nice to have a few minutes that are not filled with the expectation of adulthood, the attention seeking of children or the responsibilities of wife and co-worker to my husband. In the drive I took in the energy of the city. There is an energy here and it really awakens my spirit and gives me a sense of euphoria that I can not accurately explain. I’m excited that I’ve scheduled meetings in Manhattan on Saturday and will be visiting friends briefly out in Queens to get rid of offer my baby gear for their triplets! So I’ll have more of this time alone with the city. It re-energizes me. I know some people just don’t understand my strange affinity towards NYC but that’s ok. It’s not easy to describe. And I’m not asking people to know what I’m talking about, but I do appreciate those that totally ‘get it.’

I’ve been immensely busy lately. Not in the sense that the schedule is packed in every moment of the day but in the reality that things are in need of my attention. Ari will turn 3 next month and Nilsa is now 13 months old. This is a great age for both of them although Ari still is a bit too rough with his sister. Not to be outdone, Nilsa does NOT let herself be taken advantage of. She has started to rebel back to Ari so they will both be quite an interesting bunch in the coming months. This age separation they have is something I now count as a blessing. I won’t lie, at first it was rough. A toddler who was not able to really explain himself and a newborn was not an easy task. But we got through that and we’re onto the next stage. Age 3 is proving to be a battle of the wills for Ari and I’ve been told that talk of terrible twos is false and it’s should really be terrible threes. I’m inclined to believe that’s true. Nilsa, who I thought would suffer from the stereotype second child syndrome of being left out of things, is actually quite the opposite. I’ll reluctantly admit that I think the girl is spoiled. In attempt to not disrupt Ari’s usual routines we failed to really establish one with Nilsa and suffer the consequences. Everything we didn’t do with Ari and said we wouldn’t do with our kids we’ve succumbed to with Nilsa. Teaches you to never say never right? It is fun to see how very different they are and how very much alike they seem at times. There are the good times where I’m practically brought to tears of happiness and then the bad times where I’m driven to drink. But I’m enjoying this as much as I can.

I’ve started having a very interesting following online due to my recent Colorblind jobs. It’s like I have my own personal fan club and I have to say if feels good to really get recognition for the attentiveness I give my clients. So much so that I wish I could do more, be more and try more. My mind races with ideas and innovations and so many different things that I seemingly want to implement. I have huge spurts of motivation where I want to act on my intuition and ambitions and unfortunately find myself limited in time and resources to really accomplish my objectives. I’ve resolved that I shouldn’t get down about that and that although I can’t do what I want to do right this very moment that I can pull it off over a longer term period at a slower pace. That’s better then not doing it at all right???

Managing life with so many variables in it is never easy. Rob and I have managed to get backlogged in some things but nothing has become more delayed then the basics of life (i.e. laundry & housekeeping.) I will tell you that the largest negative to having a home based office is the fact that you are battling the priority of the jobs you need to do with the priorities of the household you need to keep. Should I be working on photos or washing clothes. Should I vacuum now or answer e-mails? It’s a constant pull in one direction or the other and everything seems to come to a decision as to what needs more attention now. And then there are the times where we want to blow off all responsibilities and build puzzles, snuggle little ones till they giggle uncontrollably or head out to the park and watch them just be. I secretly yearn for a housekeeper, a laundress and a secretary. Instead Rob and I trade off these hats depending on what time affords for them.

In general, things are well. They can always be better and we are working at getting them there. Looking at the overall scheme of things – our society as a whole, the economic conditions being what they are and the general volatility of life – I think we’re doing okay. And right now, that’s the best I can ask for.